From the Hearth: Cleaning the other day I came across a brochure snagged from shelves of promotional materials positively littering the media room of the 2000 PGA Merchandise Show. Some of the things are really quite inventive. There were the little plastic dealies meant to prop up the curdled collar of one's Egyptian cotton golf shirts after repeated washings. Imagine, celluloid collars for the new millennium!

I saved the following, maybe because it was both amusing and shocking. The show is an opportunity for entrepreneurs both large and small to present their wares. Some make the cut, others fade into oblivion. Recalling the electronic club leash seems appropriate set amidst the hopes, prospects and products of the New Year.

The contents of this folder [it reads on the cover] will save you hundreds of dollars and mountains of aggravation in your golf game.

ClubAlert . . . The Electronic Club Leash

There aren't too many things more annoying in golf than discovering you left a club or two by the green two holes back. You know the story - you grab several clubs from your bag, then your partner takes the cart to the other side of the fairway. You lay the clubs you don't need on the ground while taking your shot. Next thing you know…

Now there's ClubAlert to keep track of your clubs when you forget.

The concept of ClubAlert is simple; the result is terrific - and a real frustration saver. A small, lightweight radio transmitter inserts into the end of each club that might be left on the ground while you play a shot. Clipped securely onto your bag, a receiver continually monitors the radio waves fro each transmitter. When the receiver and a transmitter are separated by more than 60 feet, a light on the receiver flashes. If a club with a transmitter is not returned within the receiver's range in a few minutes, an audible alarm reminds you to retrieve it, thus saving your aggravation and even money for replacement clubs! [Don't you love those exclamation points? Can't you just feel the emotion? Hoo-ray!]

Order the ClubAlert system today…lower your stress and your score!

p.s. I knew you'd be interested so I checked. A year later, this is what you see when you call up their Web site, www.clubalert.com.